A few days ago I published my letter to God but left so much out that I need to say. Below is an updated and much longer letter.
Dear God,
I am weak and lacking in so many ways,
yet you are the great Creator of my days.
Strength of character was molded into
Shadrack, Meshack, and Abednego. Help me too, in faith, to grow. As
you protected Daniel in the fiery furnace, thank you for protecting me, showing
your love, full and earnest. As you closed the mouth of the lion when
Daniel was thrown into the lion's den, thank you for my protected predestined
fate as I walk, selfish-hearted, here among men.
Lord, I am in some ways like Jonah, not
instantly obedient as was Noah. But Lord, Jonah received, from you,
second chances. So please rescue me from the sinful weight of my
circumstances. As Noah was obedient, bestow in me that same
ingredient.
Like Samson, I have serious flaws, enough
I am sure to give you pause. Strengthen me Lord. Make me confident in your
provision, as was Abraham; knowing that you will provide, as only you can, for
this poor straying lamb.
Lord! Give me endurance as strong
as Job's, sustaining me in your blood-stained robe. I fear to ask for
Job's patience, but let it replace my complacence, giving action to your Word
and persevering with shield and sword.
Please give me even more perseverance like Paul's as
he traveled for your cause, always humble without self-applause. Help me
remain a loyal servant, as did Paul, though he was confined to prison but
always preaching, teaching that you, the great I Am, is risen. Thank you
that I am, as Paul was, loved and forgiven.
Let me be, Lord, a woman dedicated and
loyal as in the example of Ruth. Always let me show forth honesty and
truth. When in harm's way or striving to make a decision, let me do as
Ester, seeking your face morning, noon, and night so you may guide me into the
light.
Lord, I know this
letter is getting long, but I don't want my life going wrong. Please bear with me as I endeavor to lift the
blinders from my eyes and truly see.
Please don't let me
follow in the footsteps of Judas's betrayal or Peter's denial. Keep me true to you through earthly trial.
I pray you protect me
from evil as you did Lot. Let me give it
all I've got, not looking back as I flee from evil as did his wife, ignoring
the instructions which would bless my life.
I pray that I am not defiant, willing to grow in faith, a faith as strong
as David's when he defeated Goliath. the giant. I pray for the right words to say when wrongs
are apparent like you gave the right words to Moses and Aaron.
Lord all the people I
have mentioned were broken with character flaws in some way, but you used them
for mighty deeds in their day. Use me
too, Lord. Strengthen in me your
Word.
Finally Lord, I know
Satan is going to and fro, not wanting me to grow. Keep his wicked, godlessness from my door so
my sinful ways are less than they have been before. Put wings beneath my feet to avoid his
deceit.
I thank you for my new
name. Just as you changed the names of Sarah,
Jacob, and Abraham, I lift my voice saying, Lord, here I am. I thank you for my name change though I am not worthy because of
my shame. Yet, I am proud to be called Christian
and Child of God as I venture into my predestined mission.
I bow before you, Lord,
thanking you for your love in spite of what's I've done, for only you know my
work and, though flawed and marred, it has only, daily, just begun.
Your Child,
Mary Nell
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